Wordsmiths

As I write, wordsmiths of the highest order are busy creating neologisms for our language. 

Have you launched yours yet? I've been trying hard with my ja-ba-la-ba-loo, an obvious but delightful play on Fred's Flintstone's ya-ba-da-ba-doo. It's usage doesn't yet appear wide spread.  

Clearly inspired by the unmanageable temperature changes of menopausal women, I've greater hope for my phrase, the Goldilocks's Effect. But enough about my own efforts.

While LOL, BTW and OMG have now officially been added to the Oxford Dictionary, I've trouble believing these abbreviations were created by high-order wordsmiths. It was more likely the dumb luck of tetchy people. 

Although I don't mind telling you, they leave a slight flesh wound. Ja-ba-la-ba-loo has infinitely more zing.

William Spooner (1844–1930) was a neologist and Oxford don famous for spoonerism - the linguistic phenomenon of accidentally - or intentionally - swapping letters, words, or vowels in a sentence... 

- Go and shake a tower: Go and take a shower

- Let us glaze our asses to the queer old Dean: Raise our glasses to the dear old Queen

- We’ll have the hags flung out: flags hung out

That's kinda cute...I mean, that's behind my flute.

To think all the words in all our books are created from only 26 letters...

For those new to neologisms, I'd suggest attempting the Washington Post's Neologism Contest, often featured in their Style Invitational. You're allowed to alter any word by adding, subtracting or changing one letter. You must also offer a new definition. Some of my personal favorites are...

-  SARCHASM: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it  

-  ARACHNOLEPTIC FIT: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web  

-  CATERPALLOR: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating 

-  INTAXICATION: the euphoria of getting a tax refund lasting only until you remember it was your money to begin with  

-  PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to make it work again  

Over time some words simply grow tired, but their meanings cannot be retired. This only fuels neologisms. But personally, I'd still rather "take my ease" than "chillax". I'd rather find myself "bejeweled" than "blinged". 

I mourn the loss of "balderdash" and "gobbledegook". 

I'll continue to make use of "extraordinary" and "astonished" even should the rest of the world let them go. Both are...wicked cool.