Lobster Thoughts

Lobster thoughts continue to plague me during daylight hours.

I'm a huge fan of this yummy crustacean but prefer it be flirting with my melted butter rather than walking past me on a leash as mentioned in my I Resemble That Remark post of October 3rd.

 Although in that post I mention Oscar Wilde as engaging in this curious activity, he wasn't the first. Gérard de Nerval (1808 – 1855), a French poet and essayist, had a pet lobster named Thibault which he walked at the end of a blue silk ribbon in Paris' Palais Royal Garden.  Mr. Nerval is known to have said:

"Why should a lobster be any more ridiculous than a dog? ...or a cat, or a gazelle, or a lion, or any other animal that one chooses to take for a walk? I have a liking for lobsters. They are peaceful, serious creatures. They know the secrets of the sea, they don't bark, and they don't gnaw upon one's monadic privacy like dogs do." 


While he does make several excellent points, I've news for this gentleman. Any animal whose brain is in its throat, whose teeth are in its stomach, who hears with his legs and tastes with his feet leans upon the ridiculous. And if truth be told, lobsters are peaceful only when they've lots of elbow room. Crowd them even the slightest and they exhibit less peaceful and more cannibalistic qualities.

I'm just not seeing them as pet worthy. Those who do perhaps don't realize lobsters are giant sea insects related to woodlice, barnacles and water fleas. With this information in hand, strolling about with one could be termed macabre. It makes you wonder why we never saw Wednesday Adams walking a lobster.

Created by Salvidor Dali in 1936, now in the Tate Gallery

Leave it to Salvidor Dali to toss his art into this lobster pot. Lobsters are featured in a number of his works as he found them - and the telephone - to have strong sexual connotations. And the two together? I imagine the day he thought of a lobster phone was especially...memorable. For myself? I'm not on board with a lobster phone either.

And unlike Wallace Simpson, the American divorcee who married the Duke of Windsor amid wild scandal in 1937, you won't see me donning a dress plastered with a huge lobster and scatterings of parsley sprigs.

Dress created by Elsa Schiaparelli, 1937

Wallace Simpson, the Duchess of Windsor (1895-1986),
Photo by Cecil Beaton (1904-80). UK, early 20th century.

Part of me cringes at devoting so much mental energy to them, but lobsters do seem to capture the imagination. At least I'm not dreaming of them so, according to most dream dictionaries, I'm free of unresolved problems. 

Are you thinking my fun quota is low? If that were true, would I ask these questions:

How long does it take a lobster to run a marathon?
A shell of a long time!

Where does a lobster keep his clothes?
In the clawset!

But why is he afraid to go in there to get them?
Because he’s clawstrophobic!

Lastly, now that I think on it, lobsters are rather serious looking. Or maybe scholarly? What DO they know?

Mark my words. The next time you chance upon a lobster, you're going to look into his eyes. You simply won't be able to help yourself.

Oh...and mark your calendars! June 15th is National Lobster Day. Whichever way you fly...butter or leash, don't let this day slip by you.